Saturday, 16 February 2008

change

i think "change" has been my problem this week
i am not good at change

there has been so many changes in the last year... selling the cottage that i loved, losing a friend to Cancer that i more than loved, closing my shop, moving to the other end of the country

and now change again
new puppers, the house being almost ready so yet more packing and another move....

i wish i could share the new house plans with you but i have a fear of Mr Jinx!
basically the house is almost complete in the factory - we are waiting for the underfloor heating system and the HUGE pieces of glass for the front - it then gets moved to site and is up and weather tight in about three days.
this is also one of my problems this week
i have never, ever wished to live in a new house
please do not get me wrong - i feel incredibly lucky to have had the opportunity to help design the house from start to finish, but that in itself has been stressful
so many decisions and choices - and we can only afford to do it once
there will be no money left in the pot for changes!

so choices of showers, taps, flooring, sinks.....
the list is endless and i see no end in sight
the major problem - and it is major - is that i do not have a love of new furniture or kitchens!
all but a few of our belongings are old - mainly painted - but old
how will this fit in our new house?
can i successfully blend the old with the new?
have i made the right decision on flooring?

ahh - the flooring..... many sleepless nights have been spent worrying about the bloody flooring
i cannot and will not have laminate of any sort - even the extra expensive, so called engineered flooring that says it is absolutely not laminate - but looks a whole lot like it
i have settled - much to everybody who is involved in the project horror - on just ordinary wide pine boards that will be painted white
it is what i have always liked - it is what i have always had
no change

the thought of painting the very large expanse of floor is a little daunting, and the cost of the Eco friendly floor paint - EEEEKKKKKK!
but the decision has been made and i am not thinking of flooring ever again
(apart from what floor to have in the sheep / donkey / pig shed - but that is another story...)

we think we have sorted our wood burner saga at last (thank you Jane xx)
the trouble we have had is finding a burner that will adequately heat the large open space we will have, and also finding one that is plain and yet beautiful.
the joy of speaking to a chap who actually makes the burners right here in Scotland... well it made a rather bad week all better x
and the extra tips he gave on owning a Rayburn were perfect.

ahhh - the Rayburn - currently sitting outside looking forlorn and a little battered.
not an Aga - apparently they do not burn wood as well as a Rayburn - but she is Duck Egg Blue x

enough i hear you cry

i will sign off today and leave you with a whole heap of thank yous
thank you to everyone who left a message
and thank you to all that emailed - you know who you are - without you this week i would have been a nervous bloody wreck!


and just in case you thought i was leaving without a few pics...
i give you

Archie on the piano looking very handsome
please ignore the large axe handle......



Bracken on the piano wondering how on earth a lady of her great age got up there.....





and a close up of the Ghillie Monster

slowly turning grey, and slowly taking over this tiny cottage!





much love
t x

p.s - sorry about the change of blog AGAIN, but the tulips really were not me, and that list had to go!

also - sorry to my mum the hairdresser - yes that is me with a bad fringe that i cut myself with my fabric scissors....

22 comments:

Kitty said...

I like the new header very much. I like your fabric-scissor cut fringe very much.

Your new house sounds lovely. My Grandma had a Rayburn in her cottage - I have nothing but fond memories of Rayburns, and the delicious foods she cooked in hers.

Glad you are feeling a bit less 'EEEK' - (((hugs))) - take care. x

Katie twinkles said...

Hi Tracy,

I want to reassure you that all humans don't really like change so don't worry about feeling down.....
all the changes that you been thru will have been very exhausting.loss loss loss even in the midst of gain and being removed from people you love geographically even if you are on top of the world nearly.
I was a bit sad when i passed your shop the last two days and I felt really bereft as I realised I would have to make do with browsing the chemist shop instead and had to remind myself that despite the loss of my favouristic shop ever with all those comforting things that made me feel relieved there was someone else in sussex with a child like penchant for all things cute I can at least keep in touch via blogging and browsing the on-line shop.
(went past again today, this time on the way to Bodiam.)
I just love love love about the white floorboards which is always my choic. Every floorboard I can see is painted such.
It is all moving on, breaking thru, discovering new things about life and yourself and what better time than spring-all about birth and creation and newness.
It will all be wonderful.
x

PS maybe find a hairdresser eh?

Anonymous said...

I think your choice of flooring is fabulous!

Nonnie said...

I think everyone hates change. I know I do. It's totally normal to feel weird after everything you've been through the last year. But the new house sounds totally fab. It reminds me of an episode of Grand Designs! Plain painted boards sound really great too. When I ever get my own home I would love painted floor boards rather than the synthetic magnolia coloured on I have now chosen by my oh so stylish(not!)landlord!Love the pics of the gorgeous cats and adorable Ghillie. I even texted my Sis last night to make sure she called by your blog to see Ghillie. She's a total dog lover but often gets a little behind on her blog reading due to a lively two year old boy! Take care and have a relaxing weekend. Try not to worry about house,it will be lovely I'm sure of it. x

Vintage to Victorian said...

So much change in such a short time - you earned your moment on the doorstep. Yep, like the new banner!

Sue x

Elizabeth said...

I'm sure your furniture will look right at home in your new house. I saw an episode of 'Grand Designs' this week where the couple had a wonderful new house built in southern Scotland, and had filled it with all their old and well-loved furniture - it worked wonderfully well and really made the new house a proper home immediately. As the woman who owned the house said, 'why would they want new furniture? They were still the same people who loved the same old things even if they were living in a new house.' Hope you still feel a bit less stressed.

Angel Jem said...

Oh my! My 10 year old hates change.... and I understand where he's coming from. And there has been so much change for you all in one year, plus sometimes you have made so many decisions that the thought of one more is insanity.
That's when you hit the blogosphere and have lots of us giving you mental hugs and support. You cry, girl, and laugh and scream and feel better. You deserve it!

Poppy Black said...

I do understand your worries! We are to build a house this year, and I am so worried that it won't be pretty. I love vintage things, and wanted a big old villa to live in. Mr.B wanted maintenance free, and since we are so busy working, he won. I'm a big fan of the personal hair cut. Saves a lot of money. I've only ever had one slip-up (an unfortunate choice of tools- kitchen scissors lack refinement). I went to a birthday party last night, and hardly knew any of the 50+ people there. It was all too traumatic, and when the birthday boy said lovely things about being friends with us I burst into tears and couldn't stop for ages. I think sometimes you just need a good cry! I wish I could visit and see all of your animals. I've got my doggy, cat and rabbit friends too.

French Knots said...

Chnage is always hard, I think we all like to be in and with the familiar.
The house will be wonderful because it will be filled with love, of your adorable animals and each other. Once you get your woodburner going and sit toasting yourself in front of it it'll feel like home I'm sure.x

driftwood said...

gosh it sounds like a tough week, keep remembering it will be worth (says she who burst into tears at the mess the builders were making of her kitchen this week), trust your instincts with your choices, and don't forget we're all here for you. xx

Jane said...

I once cut Zoe's fringe so badly squint and then kept trying to straighten it up tillshe ended up with hardly and hair there and looked like Frank Skinner.
You look fine.
No-one likes change much. I hate laminate and so do dogs. We have been living with painted chipboard for 5 years now because I took up the carpets and we have been waiting to be able to afford proper floors. We have now bought oak boards taken out of the old Habitat in Glasgow - your white boards sound lovely.
J
x

Pipany said...

I hate change too Tracy and also have an inbuilt need to live in old houses (my first bought home was a 400 yr old cottage). Now I live in a 30s bungalow!!! Marriage break up made it a necessity but when i came around the side gate and saw the tulips and cherry tree blossoming I was sold. The house has loads of character and this is what you will put into yours - old painted furniture in a new house is just what's needed to tone and mellow it. Love the fringe xx

serendipitylovesnewyork said...

Hi. I've just dicovered you are Mollycupcakes friend, I love your website shop, when is it coming back? I have a similar little online shop and love the things that you sell. xx

mollycupcakes said...

Don't stress Tracy, everything will fal into place in your new home. Look how beautiful your old cottage was in Hawkhurst. Just think of that love for it and put it in the new but on a bigger scale.
I just love the sound of the Rayburner and flooring. And am bursting to see the finished photos.
You order is nearly done, so sorry it's taken longer than I expected. Just bunny pegs need bunnies on lol and then off in the post they will go.
Hugs from across the miles.
Lots of love.
Catherine x

Barbara said...

Love the new blog look. It's bright, light and fresh.

The plans for the new house sound amazing. A melding of old and new is always good. Love white floorboards and the huge window - especially love the sound of that. Duck egg blue - gorgeous!
Lovely musical cats and oh so sweet pup.

Looks like you have a good year ahead of you. Bx

trashalou said...

Please tell me you used the pinking shears for the fringe! I would think that a fabulous use of scissors and wish I could wear a fringe too!!

Such a busy week for you - I am sure the 'eeeeek' will lessen as the house nears completion. White painted floorboards sound triffic.

Change is never a friendly animal but can be tamed with courage and fortitude. I recommend timw on the beach with the girls and the ghilliehound.

Gigibird said...

A home evolves gradually over years....we all get caught up in before and after photos from magazines....what is most important is you have a lovely warm functioning home full of loved pieces of furniture and all your fur babies....it will look wonderful.
If your floor is suspended then pine is fine...a painted floor just has to be touched up from time to time....that's no biggy.
You are almost there.

Jane said...

I like your new header and the cats are very cute too. No-one much likes change and what you have been through this year is more than many people could cope with, so hang in there as best you can. I'm sure tha new house will be absolutely brilliant because you chose it and planned it. The floors sound lovely, and all your furniture will be fine in the new home as it is in your present one. I would love to live in a little old cottage instead i live in a modern link attached (terraced) 3 bed house (i try to think of it as a modern cottage! doesn't always work) we have a mix of old and new furniture and if i could i'd have more old furniture instead of new.
Good luck with your house and a good cry helps to relieve the pressure. Ghillie looks lovely too.

Raindrops to Rainbows said...

Tracy, you WILL be able to succesfully mix old and new in your soon to be house, but remember to take before and after pictures for us though! (You can also look at them whenever your down and remember your accomplishment!)
My hubby is cutting my hair for me tonight, its the first time weve done this but i trust him - and if he messes up then i have enough hair to go and get it done at the hairdressers afterwards. (my hair reaches my hips almost!).
xx

blueberry hill said...

Love the pics as ever! Sorry you had a rough week, hope this week is easier. I'm with you on the laminate, I can't stand it either. I can't even rent a holiday house with it in it!

Nin said...

My goodness! No wonder you're stressed!

BeachysCapeCodCupboard said...

I've just come across this post (feeling rather glum here, too, as all my kids have been sick this week during their vacation)... however, even though change is hard (when I married, I moved into a new home after having lived in our 5th generation 150yr old family homestead which once even boasted a farm)... it was the area to which I moved that made me happy... the land, the sea, the quiet... remember your house may be new, but your home is on beautiful land which is as old as time itself. =)